The one with the lady

Hey, It’s Diggy

Several weeks ago now. Possibly months. Time has become more of a vibe than a measurement.

I had to take my daughter to the hospital for a hearing test. She’s had hearing issues for most of her life, although these days they’re actually much better. Technically, she doesn’t really have hearing problems anymore, but she still has to go in for check-ups from time to time.

So off we went.

The Long Appointment

The appointment took ages. By the time we came out, we were both:

• Very hungry

• Very thirsty

• Emotionally fragile

I, in particular, needed coffee in a way that felt medically necessary.

The Café Hunt

The hospital was in a town we don’t normally go to. We usually go somewhere much closer, but for reasons I genuinely cannot remember, we had to travel for this one.

Why?

Doesn’t matter.

Completely irrelevant.

What is relevant is that we started walking around trying to find a café.

Every place we passed was absolutely rammed. The kind of places where you walk in and immediately feel pressured by the atmosphere. No browsing. No quiet menu contemplation. Just:

“What do you want?”

“What do you want?”

“ORDER NOW.”

We were not ready for that energy.

The Incident

As we’re walking along, my daughter suddenly says:

“Oh, Dad, look.”

She points through a window of a place we’re standing right in front of.

I turn around.

Inside is a woman breastfeeding her child.

Unfortunately, I made eye contact with her.

She made eye contact with me.

She immediately pulled a face that said, what exactly do you think you’re doing?

I panicked.

“I’m so sorry,” I blurted out.

And then I turned around and ran away.

Full retreat. No plan. Just vibes and fear.

Behind me, my daughter says:

“No, Dad, I was showing you that… that was a café you hadn’t spotted.”

To which I replied, while speed-walking:

“Yep. Yep. Let’s go. Move. Quickly. Before someone comes out and hits me.”

And So…

That is the story of the time my daughter accidentally forced me to look at a woman’s breasts in public, panic-apologise, and flee a potential café like I’d committed a crime.

We did eventually get coffee.

But not there.